I did care about staying in the loop! What exactly did I not do that I should have?! Apart from donating points, which—you're right, I did know about the fundraising, and think was a good idea, and I still chose not to. But I had no way to know she'd take everyone who donated points, and putting my points toward that sort of thing would be like raising a flag to say they should keep an eye on me. Sorry for assuming that you'd pick the right people to talk to her and then return the information to everyone!! But you shouldn't assume I didn't care!
Do you want to know my motivation?! My goals?! Everything I was not telling you?!
[She pulls her combat knife out of her skirt and slams it down on the table.]
The way I figured... There's a good chance at some point they'll slip up and give us an opportunity. But we won't know when it will happen, and we have to be ready to take advantage of it immediately, and it's best if they don't expect and prepare for beforehand. So... my plan was to stay under the radar and prepare myself for that.
I said I don't want to just wait around to kill demons, but if the opportunity arises...Well, I don't know how useful all that will be, but I do know it's something I'm good at, so... at least I can be ready. But I've got some more specialized stuff, too.
[From her corset comes a handled garotte wire. From a small pocket, a tiny vial of poison, and a matching antidote.]
Those are for Asmodeus. He reflects any injuries done to him back, right? But what about poison, or strangulation? ...I can at least try, and if it hits me, I can deal with it.
I've practiced a lot of things, too. Not just fighting. It's not the same without Makes Perfect, but I don't want to rely too much on the abilities they gave us, anyway.
[a pause]
...I know that's still mostly about killing. I've tried to think of ways I can learn more about what's going on. It's true I'm not good at lying, and Asmodeus is more likely to be interested in talking to me than Exael anyway... because of the whole 'vengeance' thing. But I've been pretty public about how much I hate him, so I don't think I could play along. Still... I want to see if I can figure out what he wants from Absinthe. Or, if I could convince Exael or someone else that I want to kill him more than anything, and get them to try to use me that way...? That wouldn't really be a lie.
But I don't know how to execute on those things, and I don't want to run into whatever you're doing, either. That's why I keep talking about working together.
no subject
Do you want to know my motivation?! My goals?! Everything I was not telling you?!
[She pulls her combat knife out of her skirt and slams it down on the table.]
The way I figured... There's a good chance at some point they'll slip up and give us an opportunity. But we won't know when it will happen, and we have to be ready to take advantage of it immediately, and it's best if they don't expect and prepare for beforehand. So... my plan was to stay under the radar and prepare myself for that.
[Also from her skirt comes a set of throwing knives. Then a trench knife, from her boot, the navaja knife to match the one she gave him, from her hair, and her revolver, from her concealed back holster. They all get laid out in a row.]
I said I don't want to just wait around to kill demons, but if the opportunity arises...Well, I don't know how useful all that will be, but I do know it's something I'm good at, so... at least I can be ready. But I've got some more specialized stuff, too.
[From her corset comes a handled garotte wire. From a small pocket, a tiny vial of poison, and a matching antidote.]
Those are for Asmodeus. He reflects any injuries done to him back, right? But what about poison, or strangulation? ...I can at least try, and if it hits me, I can deal with it.
I've practiced a lot of things, too. Not just fighting. It's not the same without Makes Perfect, but I don't want to rely too much on the abilities they gave us, anyway.
[a pause]
...I know that's still mostly about killing. I've tried to think of ways I can learn more about what's going on. It's true I'm not good at lying, and Asmodeus is more likely to be interested in talking to me than Exael anyway... because of the whole 'vengeance' thing. But I've been pretty public about how much I hate him, so I don't think I could play along. Still... I want to see if I can figure out what he wants from Absinthe. Or, if I could convince Exael or someone else that I want to kill him more than anything, and get them to try to use me that way...? That wouldn't really be a lie.
But I don't know how to execute on those things, and I don't want to run into whatever you're doing, either. That's why I keep talking about working together.